Since You've Been Gone

I've only shed a few tears once or twice.  :)

Gavin said he hates birds.  Well, only birds that poop.

The bathroom feels empty to me.  Weird I know, but I miss seeing your razor and shaving cream on the counter.

The girls have been so amazingly helpful.  Don't think I could do this without them.

Zachary used a stay home from school pass.  He was so excited to build Gavin's new Lego's that he woke Gavin up at 6:45 and came down stairs and said, "What are the girls still doing here?"  By 8:45 I had to tell him that if there was one more argument between he and Gavin then I was going to take him to school.  

McKenna tripped Kate while running in P.E. because she was trying to pass her.  I had to talk to her about not having to be so competitive ALL the time.

I surround myself with pillows at night so the bed doesn't feel so empty...and yes, I'm still sleeping on your side of the bed.

When coming home from the grocery store earlier in the week and pulling into our driveway where your car sits Gavin excitedly exclaimed, "Mom, Dad's home!"  Sorry little buddy, not yet.  Then today when pulling in he said in a sad voice, "Oh, whens Dad going to be home?"  

I miss that you always empty and take out the trash.

The kids desperately miss wrestling with you.

I'm doing pretty good about remembering to lock my car at night, you'd be proud of me! 

Grayson still hates the swing.  But he likes being in his little chair in the kitchen if I'm in room with him.

I tuck the kids in at night and think of you.

I check on them before I go to bed and think of you.

Meals are much simpler, it's kind of nice.

I haven't worn make-up other then mascara, and my hair has been curly about half of the time.

Something has clicked with Abby and the piano.  She now practices every day without me have to remind her or ask her.

Zachary can't get his head out of the book Hugo, he loves it so much.

Gavin wore a fireman's hat to run errands in because he didn't want to comb his hair and he didn't want to wear his UVa hat either.  Funny kid.

Friends have been very good to me and make sure I don't get too lonely.  

The kids still sing Adele as they clean up the kitchen after dinner.  Although now they've added in Kelly Clarkson's "Stronger" and Katy Perry's "Part of Me."  I keep forgetting to record them.

Our home teacher picked up things at Sam's Club for me because he was going there anyways and checked to see if I needed anything.

Granola seems to be everyones favorite snack these days.  I'm making a double batch weekly.

Dinner conversation still consists of stump you math questions initiated by Gavin.  Somehow every day he thinks that 100 plus 1,000 is going to trick everyone!

Abby is asking on a daily basis to be allowed to see The Hunger Games.  I'm about ready to tell her that if she keeps asking then I'll up the age to 15!

McKenna keeps us all laughing.  That girl is as witty as can be.  And I love that she's able to laugh at herself.  I think she's got rule number six down pat!

Zachary is giddy about testing for his yellow belt next week.  I don't know if I've ever seen him this excited about anything before.

I definitely experiencing the enabling power of the Atonement.

We were gone from our house for 7 hours on Saturday....during which McKenna forgot to bring her soccer cleats with her for her game.  Somehow playing in flip flops wasn't going to work.   Luckily we knew someone playing right before us and we were able to borrow a pair...she ended up having an outstanding game.

I'm not good a getting the flies.

I have gotten very good at plunging our toilets.

Gavin is still going to the bathroom every night right in the middle of dinner.  That kids system works like clockwork!

I feel like out house is being taken over by Lego's...I guess that's a good thing.  And Gavin amazes me at how good he is at building the sets he got for his birthday.

Zachary gets as mad as a hornet when he has to cut his own food.  He says it feels uncomfortable and he hates it.  I tell him I'm not going to be there when he's 16 and on a date to cut his food for him.

Gavin is starting to act out in his behavior.  I know it's because you're gone and he's missing you so much.

I've had a few bad parenting moments, but overall I've been pretty patient with the kids.

The kids are loving the Bean Game and want to play it all the time.

I have a love/hate relationship with P90X.  This morning Gavin said Tony Horton was a nice man.

I have taken over sitting at your place at the dinner table.  It's a nice view of everyone, I can see why you like sitting there.

Gavin sings his "lullaby's" to Grayson.  They consist of Jingle Bell Rock, Santa Clause is Coming to Town, and Mean by Taylor Swift.

Grayson is sleeping 7 hours straight hours at night, hopefully it wont belong before he's able to do 8.

Abby is half way through Lord of the Rings.  She's so excited for a movie marathon with you.

Life is going on in the busy, funny, crazy little ways it always does.  It's a good life, just a whole lot better with you around.

Growing Grayson

It happens so fast.  In a blink of an eye really.  One day they are your precious little new born.  All bundled up and little.  And then one day, literally over night, they are not a new born anymore.  They become a full fledged baby.  

 (Sadie is the most submissive animal ever...just look at her face)

 And now he's two months old!!!  And what a big two month old he is at that!  We had the two month check up yesterday...he weighs 14 pounds 5 ounces putting him in the 90% for weight and is 24 1/2 inches long putting him in the 85% for height.  Yep, we make them big around here.  

Gavin Is Four!!!

I can't believe it...my little boy is getting so big!  Today was the big day, the day he's been waiting for for weeks now, the day he's finally the same age as Claire again!  He didn't like that at the beginning of the month she had a birthday and turned four and yet he was still three.  This kid has given us a run for our money and kept us on our toes, make no mistake about it.  But in the last 6 months or so he has grown up so much!  He is such a funny little guy and is always making the funniest little comments.  He is so full of energy, but at the same time has such a tender little heart.  He is always telling me that he loves me and giving me hugs and kisses all the time.  He is also such a great big brother and loves Grayso and is very sweet and tender with him.  This is such a fun age and I love spending my days with this buddy of mine.

Some things that Gavin loves these days: Lego's, jumping on the tramp, playing the wii, Claire, anything sweet and full of sugar, Captain America, cars and trucks, wrestling with Dad, coloring, the movie How to Train Your Dragon, and Sweet Frog.

We actually officially celebrated Gavin's birthday last Saturday while Bret was still in town.  He got a Captain America action figure, a Lego set and an outdoor basketball hoop

Bret was so excited to give him the basketball hoop, and thought Gavin would love it.  But when he opened it he turned around to us and said in a disappointed voice, "Dad, this is not cool!"  Sorry Bret!

Originally the girls were going to give Gavin a small little party tomorrow, but at the last minute we changed it so that Bret could be here for it.  I have to say, it's the best little party I put together in 24 hours ever!  It was a superhero themed party.  We painted superhero masks, launched a rocket, played superhero bingo, and had some superhero training activities like target shooting, speed tests, and agility tests...

Gavin giving a pillow a nice karate kick

Gavin and his crew of girls... (plus Jonah)

Ellie, Claire, Gavin Rylie, Jonah and Emma

He was just beaming the whole time and felt so special.  

 Today we brought froggie cupcakes to preschool, then he and I went to lunch at "Burgers and Fries" and topped it off with a little Sweet Frog.

 He originally requested Swedish pancakes, spaghetti, broiled potatoes and broccoli for dinner tonight.  We settled for Swedish pancakes and strawberries and ended with more cupcakes for dessert.

Happy Birthday Gavin!  We love you so much and are so grateful for all you add to our family!

Turned One Corner...Facing Another

The last 6 weeks have been rough.

The first three weeks with Grayson were a dream and everything was so wonderful.

And then colic set in.

I've heard people before say they couldn't have any more kids after their hard baby, and I couldn't understand that.  My babies had all been so good and so easy.  They slept great from the very beginning, sleeping well at night and taking good naps, happy, content, they loved their swing and their bouncy chair.  Babies were so wonderful, how could anyone not want more?

I now understand how those mothers felt.

I've always said I didn't think I could handle a colicky baby very well.  And I didn't.  It's been hard.  VERY hard.  I've cried a lot.  I couldn't enjoy Grayson, because all he did was cry.  I stopped eating chocolate.  That didn't help.  I stopped eating dairy.  That didn't help.  All I did was hold a crying baby.  It sucked every last ounce of patience I had out of me.  Which led to me snapping at the smallest thing one of the other kids did,

Through all of this Bret was wonderful.  Holding and walking circles with Grayson to give my arms a break.  Doing everything around the house that I was unable to get to...which was A LOT!!!  He took care of all the school mornings; getting up with the kids, getting them breakfast, helping with lunches and getting them to school.  He even sent me out for an afternoon to myself so I could see The Hunger Games.  Those two hours in a movie theater all by self with no fussy baby to hold and rock and bounce were great.

But I'm happy to say that I really feel like we've turned a corner with the colic.  The fussiness and crying are gone.  Thankfully!!!  He's sleeping great at night.  He smiles all the time and is just happy when people look at him.  He still is pretty needy.  He doesn't like his swing.  He loves and needs to be held all the time.  And that's hard.  I have to carry him a lot in a carrier (we say I'm in my fourth trimester with him attached to my belly).  He catnaps during the day unless we are in the car or he's being held.  But I also think that he is having more and more alone time where he is content and happy.  And I think that will continue to improve.  It's still challenging, but SO much better.

And just when we turned this corner, another one loomed in front of us.

Bret is now spending the next 8+ weeks in Southern California.  This is actually one of those really hard, but great things in our life.  Thanks to my brother-in-law Bo he has access to Panda Express where he is gathering research/data for his dissertation.  Such a huge hurdle in and of itself to have a site to gather data.  And such a hard thing that it happens to be clear across the country.

And so I find myself the single parent of five kids.

The anticipation of his departure was torture.  The goodbye was more then a little tearful.  But we're on our way and we're four days closer to when he comes home.  It's hard without him; physically, mentally, emotionally.  The kids miss him like crazy, I miss him like crazy.  It's hard on him too.  He's missing precious weeks with Grayson and he misses us so much.

I've done hard things in my life, but always with Bret by my side and we've done those hard things together.  I'm sure I'll look back and realize that I grew and learned a lot during these 8 weeks.  I'm just looking forward to being on the other side of this.

But for now I wake up each morning and take one day at a time.  I pray for my shoulders to be strengthened. I look forward to when the caller ID says "call from Bret."  I put first things first things first and let many things go.

Easter

I love Easter.  I love message of Easter.  I love the non-commercialization of it.  I love the opportunity to testify not only of the Savior's perfect life, but of his death and resurrection and what that means to all of us.  

This year was our second annual string maze around the house...the kids each had their own color of yarn that were tied to their bedroom door knobs that they had to follow through the house to find their baskets.  

Because of our late church time, we got together with friends for an Easter Brunch and egg hunt.  The little kids got to go first...

followed by the rush of the big kids...

After all the candy eggs had been found...the hunt for the "Golden Egg" began...Mae Evans and Gavin Harris both found the silver eggs.  McKenna and Liam both found the golden egg at the same time.  Liam was a little faster on the draw and grabbed it first, but then was nice enough to split the winnings with McKenna.

I love how the kids trade their findings

I wanted to take a few pictures of the kids and then our whole family before we left for church...I got a few good ones of the kids, but in the process Abby actually dropped Grayson.  She was holding him, but he squirmed and she didn't have a good enough hold and he went head first down the corner where the steps met the porch.  We were actually VERY lucky it wasn't worse then it was.  He landed mainly on bushes and got a little scrape on his head, and other then being scared he was OK.  I actually saw it all happen through the lens of my camera...which I dropped and ran over to them screaming, "Oh my heck!!! Oh my heck!!!"  Probably not the best thing to be screaming on Easter Sunday, but I had just seen my baby drop head first.  Needless to say Abby felt horrible and I hat a pit in my stomach that lasted several hours.  Bret and I can see it now six or seven years from now Abby saying, "Grayson, stop being so stupid."  To which he'll reply, "We'll you're the one that dropped me on my head."

Here's our little crew...

Spring Break Recap

Spring Break was a few weeks ago...but here's a recap of our week...

• There was lots of staying up late and sleeping in
• The kids formed the GAMZ club (Gavin, Abby, McKenna, Zachary)...they had a sleepover in the girls room, lunch in the girls room, jumped on the tramp together made a poster, and created a pledge.

• There was a little bit of spring cleaning 
• Lots and lots of games

• campfires and smores

• Picnic dinner at the park with good friends

• We spent a day at the Children's Museum in Lynchburg
• Lots of wrestling on the tramp with Dad...always a favorite

• Lots of playing with friends
• Movies, movies and more movies
• The girls went to a water park with friends, and Bret drove the boys and I up to DC so that I could go to the temple

I hate it when the week is over and kids have to go back to school.  Spring Break always gets me so excited for summer.  I love the kids being home.  I love free evenings of no activities, practices or lessons.  I love being able to stay up late and sleep in.  I love no alarm clocks.