A Lesson In Hard Work, Sacrifice And Saving

Several years ago as we were right in the thick of Bret earning his PhD Bret and I had a thought that wouldn't it be great to take our family on a Disney cruise as a graduation present to our family. 

Last year came along and things happened so quickly with the next step in his career that we didn't have time to do anything between the defense of his dissertation and our move.  But that didn't mean that we still couldn't do something to celebrate this wonderful accomplishment!  So we decided we could do the cruise during Bret's spring break.    Pushing it off gave us a wonderful opportunity to provide some valuable lessons to our children.  

We held a family council and told them what we wanted to do as family.  But if we wanted to have this experience together they needed to work and save a large portion of the cost themselves.  We decided that we would pay them for extra chores they did and they could contribute their allowance if they wanted.  The main way we saved money was by making choices as a family.  If we were going to go do an activity or eat out Bret and I would tell the kids how much that would cost our family to do and we would give them the choice...we could do that activity or we could put the money in the Disney jar. We really wanted to teach our children the value of working and saving for something, sacrificing something you might want in the moment for something better in the future.  We kept the jar in the kitchen as a constant reminder of what we were working for and we created a thermometer that we colored in when we reached certain dollar amounts.  About every three weeks or so we would dump the money out on the kitchen table and count the money to check our progress.

These kids have worked hard I tell you for FIVE months.  They have done extra chores, they have chosen not to see movies, not to eat out, eat simply meals at home, they even made the choice that they wanted a smaller Christmas so they could put money in the jar.  It has been marvelous to see their work ethic and determination.  It has really been a wonderful experience to see the kids work and save a large amount for something big.  I feel like they have learned a valuable life skill in a unforgettable way.   I have to say that McKenna and Gavin were the ones who worked the most doing extra jobs for me around the house.  They were always asking me things they could do.  McKenna's go to was always folding laundry for me.  Gavin became a master at vacuuming and cleaning windows. 

Tuesday was a big day in our house.  It was the day they met the goal!   

That night we got a phone call from Mickey Mouse himself telling the kids how excited he was for them to come cruising with him in a week and a half!  And now the countdown for what they have worked so hard for has begun!  And I'll wager that they will enjoy and appreciate this trip all the more because they worked so hard to earn it.

Pinewood Durby

Right in the middle of all the craziness of the big snow storm, Valentines Day and Grayson's birthday fell the annual Pinewood Derby.  Secretly, I would have been just fine if the the parking lot of the church building was never able to be plowed so that it would need to be postponed.  But then this boy of mine would have been very disappointed.  

This year there was a very very nice gentleman who came to the church the weeks leading up to the derby to help the boys with their cars.  Seeing as we have ZERO power tools, this was extremely helpful.  Zachary got his cut, sanded, and painted.  This man even had a scale and weights that we could use to make sure we got it to 5 ounces exactly.  One of these work nights was canceled due to the snow and we still had a few little things that needed to be done to Zach's car.  The morning of the derby he was so kind and let us come over to his house so he could drill a few holes in the back for us to stick some weights in.  

Zach was as proud as could be of his derby car.  He named his car "The Black Mobile."  

Gavin can hardly wait until one of his own cars is racing down the track.

Zach's car did GREAT!  He came in fourth place overall out of 18 cars!

Zachary knows what he wants to get Bret for Father's Day or his next birthday...power tools to make next year's pinewood derby car!

The Boy Who Turned Two

There once was a boy who turned two.

He happend to be the youngest in a family of five children.

The special day happened to be the Monday following a very large snow storm, snow days, and valentines day.

Sunday night his mother realized that not only did she not have a present for him, but she didn't even have any balloons to decorate the house with or for him to play with.  Luckily she had a friend she could call who had balloons to share.  This unprepared mother sat back on this birthday eve and watched as her oldest three children spent an hour decorating the kitchen, stairs and the two year old's door for his birthday.  She also looked on as each of the birthday boys siblings searched the house to wrap up just the perfect present for him.   Abby and McKenna both came up with stuffed animals, Zachary gave him a basketball and Gavin gave him a choo choo train.

His birthday fell on a day when his mother and oldest sister where gone all day long at a volleyball tournament.  They did stop at Target on the way home to get a couple of things for him...including wrapping paper that wasn't Christmas themed!

Because his mother was gone the entire day of his birthday, this birthday boy has an amazing sister who pulled out a cake mix from the pantry and made him a birthday cake.

Just as the guilt for being unprepared, for not being there all day, and for not making a over the top detailed themed cake began to creep in, that mother of his had a "ah-ha" moment.  It's not always about what she does for her children that help them feel loved, important and special.  Sometimes it's more about creating and having opportunities for siblings to be there for each other, serve each other, and look for ways to make each other happy.  It's about siblings being friends.  Because the relationships they have with each other are critical.  

The boy who turned two had a great birthday.  He felt loved and special.  He opened multiple presents. He blew out the candles on his cake.  He played with balloons all day and pulled down the crepe paper that was everywhere.  And not because of his mother did, who loves him dearly, but because of what his siblings did who also love and adore him.  Those siblings of his who light up when he comes running to them when they walk in the door.  Who giggle and laugh as they play with him.  Yep, this boy who turned two is the youngest in a busy family.  But man oh man, is he ever an important part of that family.  

Grayson, I am grateful every day for the way in which you complete our family!  No more will I ever measure the age of a child by number of months.  You have brought that stage to an end.  Your love and enthusiasm for life is contagious.  You help us all discover the joy of simple things.  Happy Birthday buddy!  We love you.

Now...bring on the two year old!  

Snow Days

This winter has been unbelievable in the amount of snow days we have had off of school.  I LOVE snow days.  To me they are unexpected, magical days I get with my children.  They are opportunities to drop everything, clear the schedule and just be together.  They are days when I make a yummy breakfast for us, we stay in our PJ's all day, the kids play outside, we have hot chocolate, make cookies, watch movies and play games.  

Last week we happened to have snow days #11 and #12 of the school year.  Now if we were still living in Charlottesville this amount of snow days would mean adding on to the end of year school calendar.  But the county that we live in has what they call a "fixed calendar" so that as long as we stay under 15 snow days they will not add on school days to the end of the year.  These days were particularly unusual because they came with a projected 13-18 inches of snow.  The day before the storm hit everyone was making a trip to the grocery store.  This is what the bread isle happened to look like...luckily I was not in need of bread!  The other two items I noticed the store being out of was chocolate chips and flour.  Happily, I have chocolate chips in my food storage for just a time as this!

McKenna went out in the morning on our deck to measure the snow.  Her first attempt was with a regular ruler that just disappeared so we handed her the yard stick.  We measured in at 16 inches of snow!

Sadie got thrown out several times and would just sink and be completely covered with snow.  I'll just say that it was not myself or the kids who kept throwing her out in the snow.

Even thought we've had lots of snow this winter and the last several years, we haven't had anything like this in about 5 years.  Grayson really loved being able to be outside in it.  We don't have gloves for him and so I tapped on some mittens of Gavin's to his wrists.  

The kids made forts, caves, chairs, and even took turns burying each other in the snow.

We made and decorated sugar cookies

A New Start

November 10.

That was the last time I blogged.  And to be honest it probably wasn't even that day I blogged.  I probably blogged sometime in December and back posted it to November because I am so utterly behind in this record keeping project of mine.

Being utterly behind hasn't changed.  In fact it's only become worse.  And yet I still believe with every part of me that this blog is important for recording the events and happenings in my family.  It is an important creative outlet for me.  It is an important way for me to stay in touch with family and friends...or rather to help family and friends living far away to stay connected with us and the lives of my children.  I still love blogging.  And so rather then feeling like I can't blog until I'm caught up, I'm going to continue to stay current, blog in the present and back post events as time in my life permits.

I am in a crazy stage of life.   When my children were the ages of two, one, and a newborn I didn't think my life could become any busier.  I didn't think I could be more tired at the time of their bedtime.  I was wrong.   I often feel like I am merely treading water.  Instead of being busy within the walls of my home, now I am busy with things that take me away from home which in turn make the hours inside my home all the more busy.  The school hours of the day are filled with a half day kindergartner that really wants to be at school all day long and needs help staying engaged and busy and a two year old that gets into everything and anything.  And between those two I can barely squeeze in keeping our home in order.  Bedtime is only later for everyone then it was when they were two years old and that only means more hours for me of being "on."  Sometimes I miss the days when I could fix their problems and cause their heartaches to heal with a simple kiss and a band aid.  But as much as I miss my "little girls" I wouldn't trade it for who they are now.  This growing and aging family of mine creates more joy, laughter, happiness and fun in my life then I could have ever imagined at the ages of two, one and a newborn.  I am in love with who my children are, who they are becoming and the talents and abilities they are developing.  My calendar is full of various activities in various colors.  (Everyone has to have their own color so I can keep track of who is doing what on which days.)  I love this wonderful part of the country that we live in and the all that it has to offer.  The down side is that living in this part of the country also means that there is TONS of traffic and lots of time spent in the car in the effort to help those children of mine develop their talents and abilities.   Sometimes it feels like madness.   But honestly, I wouldn't have it any other way.  Life is good and life is full.

Bret and I often talk and reflect on what each of our children are involved in.  I don't want life to become so scheduled that they lose an important and valuable part of childhood, just being kids.  But we also want to help them and provide opportunities for them to develop their talents.  We want to provide opportunities that will challenge them, make them grow, help them develop their confidence, and have experiences that provide a source of joy.  And when you have a big family, trying to do that for every child can become a little difficult.

For the sake of personal record keeping, I want to record just exactly what our extracurricular activities at the moment consist of.

Abby is on a travel volleyball club team.  This means she has three practices a week that are each 2 1/2 hours long.  Wouldn't be as big of a deal if her practices were not a half hour away starting right when rush hour begins.  Taking her there and making it back home is not a lovely process.  Luckily I've got a carpool worked out that helps.  It also means that she has two tournaments a month that are anywhere between one and three days long.  And when I say "days long" I mean from 8:00 in the morning until 7:00 at night and then factor in the travel time to wherever it is we might be playing.  Abby is also playing the piano and has a lesson twice a month.  She is in our Young Women's program at church and so has an activity every Wednesday night, youth discussions every month, and other activities thrown into the mix.  It's so good for her and she loves everything about young women's.

McKenna is currently playing basketball, which is really no big deal because it involves one weekday practice close to home and one Saturday game.  However, her soccer team continues to practice two times a week and will soon pick back up to three.  These practices are an hour and a half long and are about 30 minutes away.  There is no carpool option for her because the team we have her practicing with is not close to where we live.  Bret usually takes her to these and works in the car while he waits for her.   It does mean that the two of them are gone for 2 1/2 hours three nights a week.  Even though it is far away, we love the team she practices with currently because she is getting amazing skill development and the coach is supportive of our faith; allowing her to practice with them even though she doesn't participate in the Sunday games.  She is also in Activity Days at church that meets twice a month, a monthly book group with girls her age, and Cotillion classes that we signed her up for hoping it would help build a friendship with another girl that was going.

Zachary is playing basketball, one weekday practice and one Saturday game.  He also does scouts at church and takes piano lessons.  He is my child that I would LOVE to add things to his schedule in order to get him off the couch and away from his reading.  Don't get me wrong, I LOVE that he reads, but there does needs to be balance in all things.  If there is every a punishment that needs to be extended to him, taking away his reading is always what we go and what has the best success.  I shake my head when I think about taking away reading as form of a punishment for a child.  Talk about parenting to the individual child!

Gavin currently is not doing anything but will play soccer again this spring.  He is just a ball of energy that needs some form of physical outlet every day.  Whether we make him run up and down the stairs each day or around the culd-e-sac, he needs some way to channel that energy and move his body.        

Yes, life is good.  Life is full.